Hands down...

I have the cutest baby ever. Period.

JUST TRY IT

http://www.lost.eu/15f

Yeeeeeeee!!!

Ok, so at the risk of sharing TMI, I lost my mucus plug today! That means that my cervix is really getting warmed up for the big event. Yeah, baby!

At first I thought it meant that I was going into labor...but I quick looked it up online and it turns out that it just means your body is THAT much readier for labor. Brian and I both think that I'm going to go into labor on Sunday night after our last Birthing From Within class.

But wow! I can't believe how close we are. And I'm so excited that my most genuine, honest reaction was absolute JOY and no fear. I'm not scared - I'm so excited!!! I can't even stand it!!!

Not long now until I'm looking in your eyes and letting your little hands squeeze my fingers. :)

1 week to go!

With only 7 days to go until my estimated due date, the excitement is mounting. I keep trying to remember that only 5% of babies are born on their due date…. It’s totally possible the baby will be a few days or even a couple of weeks “late.” So let the baby watch begin!

One of the benefits of moving to the country is that people are really helpful. This week, I called our local sheriff’s office to see who in the county does car seat inspections. As it turns out, the sheriff’s deputies make house calls to inspect infant car seats…and it’s a free service. Brian and I got a lesson from the deputy in our driveway about how to correctly install a car seat. It’s no wonder that 80-90% of the population installs them incorrectly – it wasn’t easy! That day happened to be the hottest day of the year so far….poor Brian had sweat dripping from his face and he worked to secure the car seat in the BLACK CAR that had been baking in the sun all mroning.

Brian installed a gorgeous overhead light in the nursery so we don’t have to use any standing lamps. Woo hoo! That was the last thing on our to-do list: the nursery is officially done.

Our last Birthing From Within class is this Sunday. I can’t believe it’s almost over! We’ve both really loved the class and the book. Our instructors have been great and I know we’re both more confident going into labor with the skills we’ve learned from the classes.

The phone calls have begun – people from every corner of our lives are calling to “see if there’s a baby yet.” It’s nice to hear from family and friends every day…even if I do have to start the calls with “no baby yet.” I imagine that I’ll have lots of practice saying that – especially if our little peanut decides to delay her arrival past July 28!

I've been getting a massage every other week for the past couple of months from a certified prenatal massage therapist. I’ve now made that a weekly appointment -- which is such a nice treat to get a massage and relax for an hour. And I’ve given the massage therapist direct permission to hammer away at the pressure points that supposedly bring on labor.

My check up with the midwives yesterday was great. The baby’s head has dropped into my pelvis, which is fantastic news. Everything else looks good and it’s clear that my body is getting ready for the big event….

There isn’t much of an update on the baby’s progress from the Baby Center site this week…since she’s basically done “baking” and ready to come out and meet everyone. Here's what they have to say:

How your baby's growing: Your baby's ready to greet the world! She continues to build a layer of fat to help control her body temperature after birth, but it's likely she already measures about 20 inches and weighs a bit over 7 pounds. Your baby's organs are fully developed and in place and the outer layers of skin are sloughing off as new skin forms underneath.

We’ll keep you updated…

Hugs,
Ryan

We saw Kathryn (our midwife) yesterday....so much happened that I want to make sure I get it all down.

First of all, let me just say that you are one BIG little girl! You are growing and growing, despite the fact that I've cut out sugar from my diet and really been watching what I eat. You're already estimated to be over 8 pounds. A big, strong girl....I'm not surprised.

I asked lots of questions yesterday and I got very reassuring answers. There is no time limit for labor at our hospital. That means that you aren't forced to take Pitocin or get a c-section if your labor lasts a really long time (which is common for first babies). I learned that episiotomies are very, VERY rare, even with the doctors at our hospital. Our midwife has cut only one in her career and it wasn't at this hospital. That made me feel better....lots of doctors and some midwives are far too keen on cutting episiotomies and they can be very difficult to recover from.

Unfortunately, I'm Strep B positive. That means that I carry a bacteria that is totally harmless to me, but can be passed to you during birth (which could be dangerous). The solution is for me to have antibiotics while I'm in labor. If this were a home birth, I would be able to take them orally. But the hospital protocol says that I have to have an IV, which is a real bummer. Actually, I won't have to have an IV - but a hep lock - which is an IV opening in my arm, so the antibiotics can be hooked up when I need them. I'll still be able to move around freely but I'll have the hep lock in my arm the whole time, which isn't the best news.

I told Brian it will be a distraction to help with my breathing techniques - something to focus on other than the contractions/rushes.

Oh, that's the other thing. I read Ina May's Guide to Childbirth and loved it. She encourages women to call contractions 'rushes' and think of them as rushes of energy to your body. The word 'contraction' connotes tight muscles which is exactly the OPPOSITE of what you have to do to easily bring your baby into the world. Using the word 'rushes' helps put my focus where it needs to be - on relaxing through them and riding the wave of each rush as it brings me closer and closer to you, my baby girl.

But back to our appointment yesterday. Kathryn checked your heartbeat and it was very, very fast! Too fast, actually. So she sent us for a non stress test across the hall. I sat in a chair and had two hard plastic electrodes strapped to my belly for twenty minutes while a machine monitored your heartbeat. Many doctors, I learned, require their patients to wear this contraption throughout their whole labor and delivery, which entirely limits their movement during the whole process. (yuck!)

Everything turned out fine - your heartbeat was totally normal. Kathryn checked your heartbeat right after she had been pressing around on my belly and you had been kicking and stretching a bunch, which made your heartrate go up. No big deal.

Sitting in that chair, though, I was scared. It was the first time I considered that you might be in danger. Thankfully, I knew that if something WAS wrong, that you were old enough to come into the world today if you needed to. In that moment, I was willing to do whatever it took: Pitocin induction, c-section, whatever, to make sure that you were safe. I think it was one of my first real mother moments.

Kathryn told us, after feeling around my belly for a minute, that you are occipital anterior. That's not great news, kid. Your face is up against my belly - but we want it to be facing my back. I have some exercises that I'm supposed to be doing every day (lots of sitting on the floor - absolutely no laying on my back or crossing my legs) in order to encourage you to move. It'd be great if you moved for us - labor and delivery will be a lot easier for you AND me if you turn...

Kathryn did a cervical exam and it turns out that I am 70% effaced and 1 cm. dilated. We're getting there, Sophie. Only a couple more weeks (if that) and we'll be able to look at each other in the eye. Oh, I can't wait. I can't WAIT!!!

3 weeks to go...

3 weeks and counting….

I had my 37 week check up on Friday – our midwife said everything is right on track. The baby has her back to my left side, which is called “optimal fetal positioning” for labor. Good news!!

After pressing around my belly for a while, Kathryn (our midwife) guessed that our baby girl is already over 8 pounds! Of course, one only needs to look at my huge belly to know that I’m growing a big kid….

The car seat is installed, which was the last thing we had to get done before we were officially ready to welcome our peanut into the world. Now we just have to practice our breathing techniques and get calm and centered before the big event.

I’m full term now, which means that it’s safe to go into labor anytime. It’s unlikely I’ll go before my due date (July 28) as most first time moms are on time or late. I’m doing everything in my power to welcome the labor process: hammering away at the pressure points, drinking copious amounts of red raspberry leaf tea, taking evening primrose oil, staying active and walking everyday, etc….

Here’s the baby update:

How your baby's growing: Congratulations! Your pregnancy is now considered full term — meaning your baby is developmentally ready to handle life outside the womb. (Babies born before 37 weeks are pre-term and those born after 42 weeks are post-term.)

Your baby probably weighs a little over 6 pounds at this point and measures between 19 and 20 inches, head to heel.

Many babies have a full head of hair at birth, with locks from 1/2 inch to 1 1/2 inches long. But don't be surprised if your baby's hair isn't the same color as yours. Dark-haired couples are sometimes thrown for a loop when their children are born blonds or redheads, and fair-haired couples have been surprised by Elvis look-alikes. And then, of course, some babies sport only peach fuzz.

BRING. IT. ON.

I'm convinced that before I go into labor, I have to put it out into the universe that I'm ready. I have to assuage my own anxieties that might hold my body back from doing what it is ready to do.

Now that the car seat has been installed, there are lots of little things that need doing but all of the major "to-dos" are done. We are officially ready for a baby:

- The stroller is put together.
- The nursery is ready.
- There are sheets in the crib.
- The baby clothes are washed and put away.
- The diapers are neatly stacked.
- The hospital bags are packed.
- The list of things to do before we go to the hospital has been written.
- The birth plan is in place.

So now it's a matter of putting it out there to the universe that I am ready. That I want to go into labor. Bring it on, baby! I can't wait to meet my daughter!!

I know that everything will happen in the universe's perfect timing, not in mine. But I just want to make sure that I'm doing what I can to not hold up the process. So for me, that means letting go of anxieties and fears that could physically keep my body from doing what it's ready to do.

It also means doing everything within my power to encourage the onset of labor, including:

- wailing on the labor pressure points
- taking evening primrose oil
- doing visualizations of my cervix opening up and ripening
- drinking copious amounts of red raspberry leaf tea
- being intimate with Bri (when I'm up to it)
- staying active and walking a little every day

I am also focusing on enjoying these last few days/weeks WITHOUT a baby. Brian and I are letting ourselves go out to eat as much as we want. We are speding lots of money on food and movies and dates. We are listening to loud music in the car and singing at the top of our lungs. We are fighting and making up and talking and listening and cuddling. It's wonderful.

With or without baby, I'm doing great. And that's a great feeling!

Our doula is fantastic, by the way. She's hilarious and boisterous and not at all the kind of person you'd imagine to be a doula.

I'm so glad that she (Kirsten) will be attending the birth - she's got her shit together, for sure.

And it's also comforting that we'll know at least one person in the room (since we don't know which midwife will be on call when we go into labor).

I've been reading Ina May's Guide to Childbirth which has been a good experience for me. It's nice to read lots of birthing stories that involve no interventions and are POSITIVE experiences, not the nightmares that most people tell you about.

Did you know that lots of women have orgasms during labor? See? Who knew that labor didn't have to be this scary and chaotic thing - that it could be pleasurable?!?!

I'm not saying that I expect labor and birth to be a rocking good time - but I'm open to it being a spiritual, liberating experience. I'm open to having a birth experience that is calm and loving and wonderful.

In order to do that, though, I have to work on losing my fear. I have to be willing to trust my body and the universe and even the painful sensations. I have to surrender to it completely...if I fight it even a little bit, I know I'll experience the terrifying agony that many women speak of.

So I'm practicing relaxing when I feel pain. I'm practicing letting go of all control, surrendering to whatever I'm feeling. It's a hard thing to practice total powerlessness but I know it will serve me well. I just hope I can do it during labor!!

I find myself thinking of all of the things I haven't written about in this blog, all of the topics I've skimmed over or skipped altogether.

Some topics I ignored because they are really private and I'm not sure I'd share them with anyone outside of Brian and my sponsor.

Some topics I ignored because they were emotionally trying and painful.

Some topics I skimmed because I thought they were mundane.

But now, looking back on the pregnancy and looking toward the monumental event that's about to happen, I wish I had catalogued more of my day-to-day experiences.

Today, I am having back pains. Brian and I took a break from work and went to the mall to walk around. We used to walk outside around the track at the soccer fields a lot but it's so hot and muggy now that I just can't do it. So off we went to the air conditioned mall and made a couple of laps. There's something about movement that helps with the pain. Often, I don't feel back pain at all on days that I'm particularly active.

It's hard to sit at a desk all day now. I find myself taking many, many, MANY breaks (translation: not working much). I feel a little irresponsible - so much so that yesterday, I asked my boss for more work so I could stay focused.

It's also hard to stay focused. Between back aches, the baby moving around, daydreaming about labor, and all of the last minute stuff I want to get done before she gets here, it's hard to stay focused on anything other than the TV.

Also - I want to be sure to mention how challenging it is to manage other people's expectations, the in-laws in particular. I guess trying to manage anyone's anything is an exercise in futility. But I've been really surprised at how entitled people feel to this baby - our baby - MY baby. People feel like they should be welcome in our house for as long as they want - to "help" us. People feel like they should be able to come and go as they please - or assume that they are welcome to meet the baby immediately after she is born.

This presses my crazy button. *I* don't even know this child yet - give me a little while to get to know her before you lay your expectations all over us, you know?

I'm learning to manage in these situations - and I've let go of trying to control every aspect of who comes to visit and when. I'm lucky that Brian has been supportive and that we have similar feelings about people staying in the house after the baby is born. I still feel that crazy anger come up inside of me, though, when I see people making assumptions about how much time they'll be able to spend with the baby, when they will meet her, that they'll be welcome in the hospital, etc. And it still presses my crazy button when Brian's mom tells US when she will be arriving at our home, without waiting for an invitation. But I'm working on it...

4 weeks to go!

Lots going on this week…we finalized our birth plan with the doula over coffee on Wednesday and we are good to go.

Brian and I put some finishing touches on the nursery (see pics attached). It’s really coming together! Just some light cleaning, decorating, and organizing left to do….but all in all we’re ready.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/13411558@N00/sets/72157594184043074/show/

At my check up this week, we found out that I’m 50% effaced, which essentially means that my body is getting ready to go into labor. No signs that I’ll be going into labor early, though… and the doula insists that Brian and I get used to the idea of going into labor on time or late (so we don’t get stir crazy).

My belly measured slightly bigger than it should this week, which means that I may have an ultrasound in the next couple of weeks to check on the size of the baby. No surprise that she’s big (she’s been ahead of schedule since day 1)– but they just want to make sure she isn’t TOO big. J She’s in the right position, though, which is great news. The midwife told me she hasn’t quite dropped yet – but I’m sure that will be happening soon.

Celebrating my birthday this week seemed a little silly, especially considering the HUGE event that’s about to happen. We went out to dinner at the Cheesecake Factory (yummy!), then came home and spent the night making a pregnancy cast….a mold of my big, pregnant belly. (See pic attached). It was a blast – and we plan on sanding and painting it. If you have time, check out this site – which has lots of examples of what people have done with their casts. Pretty artistic stuff!

http://www.flickr.com/photos/13411558@N00/sets/72157594184039908/

Last night we had four friends over for a BBQ and board games. Brian got a carvel ice cream cake (my favorite!) and everyone sang to me, which was nice. J

As for the baby, here’s her update:

Your baby is still putting on the pounds — about an ounce a day. She now weighs almost 6 pounds and is a little less than 19 inches long. She's shedding most of the downy covering of hair that covered her body as well as the vernix caseosa, the creamy substance that covered and protected her skin during its submersion in amniotic fluid. Your baby swallows both of these substances, along with other secretions, which will stay in her bowels until birth. This blackish mixture, called meconium, will become her first bowel movement.At the end of this week, your baby will be considered full-term. (Babies between 37 and 42 weeks are considered full-term; a baby born before 37 weeks is pre-term and after 42 is post-term.) Most likely she's in a head-down position by now, which is optimal for a smooth delivery.

Less than 30 days guys. Can you believe it??

Birthing From Within - class 1

Wow. What a class.

We showed up on Sunday afternoon, not knowing what to expect. I think we were both hopeful that the class wouldn't be like the ones we'd taken through VCU (Infant childcare, Newborn CPR, etc.) that were really condascending and patronizing.

We were pleasantly surprised.

The class has five couples in it. All five couples are first-time parents, which is nice. The class is run by two women, Kristen and Melissa, who are both doulas certified in the "Birthing From Within" philosophy (based on the book).

We spent the first hour or so sharing a little bit about ourselves and learning what the class is really going to be about. From the get go, I could feel people relaxing and getting comfortable as they learned that no one was ever going to be put on the spot to share, that partners were encouraged to be active participants, that the class was designed around whatever we wanted it to be.

Through a couple of surprisingly non-cheesy ice breakers, people started opening up about their fears/thoughts on labor/childbirth. It was great to hear some of the women voice concerns that I myself have and it was even better to hear the men share about the kind of partners they hope to be during childbirth.

We learned a breathing technique called "Following Your Breath." Instead of just practicing the breathing exercise and becoming very relaxed (which would be great but isn't practical), we practiced the exercise while squeezing a handful of ice for one minute, which is the average length of a contraction.

Obviously, contractions are going to hurt more than holding ice cubes. But the idea is to learn a little bit about how your body responds to pain and, more importantly, to the breathing techniques. Because what works for you might not work for me. So before we go into labor, I should have a pretty good idea of what breathing techniques will help me through contractions.

In fact, Brian and I decided to start a stack of index cards, each with some technique or thought that helped me with the ice exercises. When we're in labor (and he's anxious or overwhelmed), he can look at the index cards and remind me of what techniques worked for me in the class. Brilliant, right?

I felt so good after that class - so confident that we're going to be ready for labor when it happens. That confidence has faded a bit over the past few days - but I'm sure I'll get another dose at our next class, this Sunday. Can't wait!!